Gentle rebukes

Exodus 13ff

Shortly after celebrating the new year, Brandi and I started talking about IRS tax stuff, wondering if we would get a refund this year.  We really enjoy getting a refund.  (Theoretically, you could make more money if you put it into an interest-bearing account or CD or something instead of letting the government just keep it, but with recent low interest rates, it doesn't seem to be worth the trouble.)  Anyway, Brandi started tutoring this past semester and made a little money.  She was asking about figuring how much was withheld for taxes, medicare, and social-security, and I made some insensitive remarks about how I was probably paying more than "my share" of taxes from "my" paycheck.  This was stupid of me on several counts, not the least of which was the fact that it is my responsibility to provide for my family because God has given me a job.  Well, naturally, this discussion digressed into general and specific critiques of how Brandi and I "each" spend money.  Sadly, I hurt Brandi with some of the things that I said.

Coincidentally, I met our pastor Greg for coffee the next day, and when he asked me how I was doing, I couldn't help but mention this situation.  In short, he listened compassionately, and gave me a gentle rebuke.  I realized that God has given me opportunities to take care of my family, and he has "blessed" me with very nice living conditions, and I don't need to be ashamed of that.  Also, I have the capacity to wisely and strategically "splurge" on doing loving things for my wife, and I should be grateful for this opportunity. Of course, these are in context of giving financially and other ways to other people and ministries, but my primary ministry is to my wife and children.  I also acknowledge the point that Brandi made that I tend to value money to highly.

I met my Brother Josh for lunch, and, of course, shared with him what was going on.  He listened compassionately, and after giving a disclaimer that he is a single man, gave me a gentle rebuke and Biblical challenge of husbandry.  I realized that I have not been a very good husband the past two years.  But I want to be.  Generalizing, I have realized that I need to invest in my family with more intensity than I invest in my work.  As my Brother JJ says, "Work hard. Play hard."  So, I resolve to connect physically, intellectually, spiritually with my wife and each of my children on a daily basis.  I also resolve to support corporate and individual social experiences on a weekly basis. 

Heavenly Father, thank you for your truth, spoken through your Children.  Please help me walk in the way of Christ.  I love you, and I ask in the name of Jesus.