Jill went to be with Jesus last Thursday evening, Jan 4.
When we found out that Jill was diagnosed with stage-four triple-negative breast cancer, I wrestled with whether or not I was going to pray for her to be healed. After losing a friend in high school, my grandmother in college, my aunt in grad school, and my uncle in early career, all to cancer, I had given up praying for people to be healed.
But I realized that Jesus lived a lifestyle of healing, and He sent out his disciples to heal. There is not a single recorded instance where Jesus told someone that it was not God's will to heal them and left them sick. Since Jesus is the exact representation of God, we can infer that it is ALWAYS God's will to heal.
I also realized that there were a few instances in which I wanted to pray for healing for my aunt when our family was all together during the holidays, but I did not speak up and ask. To this day, I regret that I did not speak up and ask that we pray for her. So, when I decided to pray for healing for Jill, I also decided that I would have no regrets. Thus, with very few exceptions, any time I saw Jill in person, I asked if I could pray for her, and she always gladly allowed me to. I prayed, I fasted, I anointed her with oil - I did everything that I knew to do to seek healing for Jill.
Sometime around this past Thanksgiving, I felt the conviction to gather some people together to pray for her. So, one Saturday before Christmas, I finally reached out to find several people who were available who I knew have seen people miraculously healed (Austin, Rachel, Joy, and Seye). It was a beautiful time of praying, singing, claiming promises, and commanding the cancer to leave. I am so thankful for that time.
I hypothesize that the reason that we do not heal with 100% efficacy the way that Jesus did is because we are not 100% connected with the Father the way Jesus was. Thus, while I am hurt that Jill was not healed, I will continue to seek to know the Father more, and I will not give up praying for people to be healed. If you have faith like an electron, you can tell that mountain to get lost. Perhaps "faith" is the extent to which we know the Father.
Father, I love you, and I know that you are good. I trust that you are good. You proved that you are good when you sent your own son to redeem all of humanity to be your adopted children. I love you, and I want to know you more, so that you may more accurately express your character through me. Jesus, thank you for your example. Holy Spirit, lead me. I love you, and I ask in the name of Jesus.
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