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Matthew 9:35‭-‬38 NIV

Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field."

Father, thank you for sending us to El Paso.  I know that you sent us here.  We want to follow Jesus's example of teaching, proclaiming the good news, and healing every disease and sickness.  Show us the next step.  I love you.

First 3.7-day fast

The Lord gave me the strength to fast for almost four days.  I wish I would have spent more dedicated time in prayer, but it still was an incredible experience. 

I ate dinner Thursday evening, and then I broke fast with dinner on Monday evening.  (I did have communion on Sunday morning, but I don't count that as breaking fast.)

I shared a few speculative thoughts with Brandi yesterday.  I think there are both temporary and permanent benefits to fasting.  In some sense, there is a heightened awareness of the spiritual reality that occurs during and after fasting, but it decays with time.  That is why it is so important to fast regularly.  But, somehow on a different dimension, there is also a cumulative effect of all of the fasting that you have done - an accumulation of the collective impacts of all of those fasts.  It changes you.

Father, thank you for the opportunity to fast.  Jesus, thank you for the example of fasting.  Holy Spirit, thank you for your presence and encouragement during fasting.  I love you.

fasting for more

I read this passage this morning in my daily reading:

Matthew 8

18 When Jesus saw the crowd around him, he gave orders to cross to the other side of the lake. 19 Then a teacher of the law came to him and said, "Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go." 20 Jesus replied, "Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head." 21 Another disciple said to him, "Lord, first let me go and bury my father." 22 But Jesus told him, "Follow me, and let the dead bury their own dead."

Our church is doing a 21 day fast (Jan 10-30), and Brandi and I chose to do a Daniel fast (this time we are doing vegan, sugar-free, and caffeine-free).  The first week, I thought I had COVID because the coincident sugar- and caffeine-withdrawals were fierce.  I am currently doing some fasting from food, and this morning, I watched a sermon about healing, and the pastor shared from Matthew 8 (the exact passage that I read earlier this morning) about how Jesus invites us to follow Him.  It will cost us, and it will be inconvenient and uncomfortable.  This really encouraged me to not give up in my fasting.  

Later this morning, I was praying for more experiences with the Holy Spirit, to grow closer to the Father's heart, and to see revival.

I just turned on Pandora radio this afternoon, and the first three songs directly spoke to those three prayers, IN ORDER (select lyrics listed for each):

1. More (Red Rocks Worship)
   I just want more, I just want more
   More of you, God, more of you, God
   I just want more, I just want more
   More of you, God, more of you
   Pour out all I have and lay down all I am
   Making room for you
   Lord, I'm ready to open up my heart
   To receive, not in part
   But the fullness of who you are
   Lord, I'm ready
   
   
2. Heartbeat (Mosaic MSC)
   Tell me all your secrets
   Tell me everything
   Show me how to love you
   Show me how to live
   Wherever I go
   Whatever I lose
   All I want is to be with you
   I wanna know your heartbeat, heartbeat
   Show me how your heart beats, heart beats
   The rhythm of your love is for me
   I wanna know your
   I wanna know your
   Heartbeat
   
   
3. Fullness (Elevation Worship)
   Now the world awaits Your presence
   And this power is within us
   We will rise to be Your image
   Spirit come, Spirit come
   Pour it out, let Your love run over
   Here and now, let Your glory fill this house
   Pour it out, let Your love run over
   Here and now, let Your glory fill this house
   Tongues of fire, testifying of the Son
   One desire, Spirit come, Spirit come
   Speak revival, prophesy like it is done
   One desire, Spirit come, Spirit come
   

This really encouraged me that He hears my prayers.  He is giving me the strength to pursue Him, and He rewards those who diligently seek Him.

Father, you are so good.  Holy Spirit, I want more of you.  Father, I want to know your heart.  Jesus, I want to see your revival explode through me.  I love you.

Seeking the Father's heart

"Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.  Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?'  Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'

Matthew 7:21‭-‬23 NIV

It is the instinct of the true believer to search for and find, that which brings pleasure to the Father.

- Bill Johnson, Dreaming with God

Many times I feel like I am doing a lot of "good things", but I'm not confident that I'm doing what God wants me to do.  I need to mature so much in my relationship with the Father; I feel like an infant/toddler who can sort of stumble around but can't have a conversation with the Father.  I think I need to spend more time trying to learn how to talk with the Father.  But most of the time, I am too busy because I am generally overcommitted.

Father, please teach me to talk with you.  Jesus, please teach me how to talk with the Father.  Holy Spirit, please teach me how to talk with the Father.  I want to know your heart.  I want my heart to match your heart.  I love you.

wonderings

Proverbs 1:30‭-‬31 NIV

Since they would not accept my advice and spurned my rebuke, they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes.

I wonder what seeds I am planting in my ignorance of wisdom.

Matthew 5:31‭-‬32 NIV

"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

You get a pastor to perform a wedding, but you get a lawyer to perform a divorce.  I wonder what fraction of couples considering a divorce go back to the pastor instead directly to the lawyer.

Father, I want to humble myself to follow you and receive your wisdom. Holy Spirit, please lead me.  I ask in the name of Jesus, and I know that you are faithful to give wisdom to those who ask. I love you.

Simple obedience

Acts 5:12‭, ‬16‭-‬20 NIV

The apostles performed many signs and wonders among the people. And all the believers used to meet together in Solomon's Colonnade. ... Crowds gathered also from the towns around Jerusalem, bringing their sick and those tormented by impure spirits, and all of them were healed. Then the high priest and all his associates, who were members of the party of the Sadducees, were filled with jealousy. They arrested the apostles and put them in the public jail. But during the night an angel of the Lord opened the doors of the jail and brought them out. "Go, stand in the temple courts," he said, "and tell the people all about this new life."

I want to be obedient like they were.  They simply lived the zoe life, and then they had opportunity to teach it.

Father, the apostles walked with Jesus, and they followed His example of following you.  Jesus, I want to follow your example, too.  Holy Spirit, thank you for being with me; please help me follow Jesus.  I love you.

The Son is inheriting the nations

Psalms 2:6‭-‬8 NIV

"I have installed my king on Zion, my holy mountain."  I will proclaim Yahweh's decree: He said to me, "You are my son; today I have become your father.  Ask me, and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possession.

Acts 2:4‭-‬6 NIV

All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit enabled them.  Now there were staying in Jerusalem God-fearing Jews from every nation under heaven. When they heard this sound, a crowd came together in bewilderment, because each one heard their own language being spoken.

Father, I praise you for honoring the Son and giving Him the nations.  I want to join you in your work. Holy Spirit, please fill me and anoint me, and demonstrate your signs and wonders through me. I love you.