point of need

Proverbs 21 and some Psalms

 

This morning I left the apartment to go meet a Brother for coffee, but my pickup wouldn't start.  It's been acting up for several months now, but it has always started after some arbitrary time of repetitious attempted ignitions.  Trying to maintain patience and a good attitude (it had been several weeks since I met with him on account of his honeymoon to Hawaii and my trip to Disney World, so I was excited about meeting with this Brother), I pulled the car around and tried to jump it.  After getting dirty with the jumper cables and an annoying duration of attempted ignitions, it finally started - but I was aggravated with the delay that was going to make me late and frustrated with an uncooperative piece of machinery.

 

On the way over to the coffee shop, still sleepy and trying to control my mood, I felt like the Lord was impressing me to be ready to listen to my Brother - that God was going to speak to me through him.  When I arrived at the coffee shop, my Brother was excited to see me and could tell that something was wrong with me.  After his inquiring, I briefly related to him the aggravation and we moved on with catching up.  He and His wife are seeking the Lord's will regarding career decisions, and I was humbled by his confidence in the Lord's sovereignty.  God truly worked through several seemingly random, chaotic events in his life and his wife's life to get their attention so that they would seek His will.

 

Throughout the subsequent conversation, I was really impressed by several things my Brother said regarding: (1) glorifying the Lord, (2) cycles of life and maturity, and (3) prayer. 

 

I was truly humbled as I realized that I have very quickly become too obsessed with my academic research.  Bruce Wilkinson talks about how the Lord gives us a dream, and then leads us through battles against giants in the desert valley to strip the dream from our selfish possession and give it back to the Lord.  I think that is where I am right now.  I must give up this dream as my own, and realize that it is God's dream that He will accomplish in my life as I am faithful to His call.  The point my Brother made is that the focus of my life has become the things that I am doing (work, family, ministry, etc.) instead of focusing on glorifying God and finding my satisfaction in Him alone.

 

The next thing that really impressed me was how my Brother was aware of the Lord leading him through cycles of life.  He recognized that he had been in a similar place in his life before, and the Lord is using this time to grow him into the next level of maturity.  My Brother spoke some very wise words of realizing that he has grown, and that he can not expect to think, operate, or especially feel the same way he did five years ago.  That was a different time, place, and he was less mature.  As we progress in our faith, we must realize that we are in constant flux.  We are ever changing in the image of Christ, and this leads us more toward a total and utter dependence on the Lord.  I have been unconsciously wrestling with these principles the last few weeks, but this conversation was incredibly poignant to help me consciously verbalize this transition into manhood and accepting the new life that comes with maturity.  The tangential point that my Brother made is that we all drift from the Lord - even mature Christians; it's just that the method and magnitude if deviation varies with maturity.  I must continually seek reconciliation with the Lord and ask Him to turn my heart back toward Him ( Psalm 80)

 

One practical point of friction is prayer.  A thought that has been bouncing around in my head the last couple of months is, "What is my next step of growth in faith?"  I have known the answer, but I haven't really acknowledged it to the point that I'm willing to seriously commit to it - until this morning.  The bottom line is that my prayer life needs to grow.  In the words of E.M. Bounds, I need to devote myself to the "business of prayer" and not settle for this shallow mockery of scriptural prayer that I have been practicing.  First of all, I need to have a consistent time of daily genuine prayer time, and secondly, I need to stay in an attitude of prayer all day.  I truly believe that it is through prayer that God significantly changes my heart and accomplishes His will in my life.

 

As you can tell by the length of this blog, this conversation had a huge impact on my life perspective because God met me at my point of need and spoke audibly to me through my Brother.  Praise the Lord that He is so merciful and gracious!

 

To follow it up, there were several verses that confirmed this conversation:

 

Proverbs 21

1 The king's heart is like a stream of water directed by the Lord;
      he guides it wherever he pleases.

30 No human wisdom or understanding or plan
      can stand against the Lord. 

31 The horse is prepared for the day of battle,
      but the victory belongs to the Lord.

 

Psalm 21

1 How the king rejoices in your strength, O Lord!
      He shouts with joy because you give him victory.
2 For you have given him his heart's desire;
      you have withheld nothing he requested.

 

Psalm 51

1 Have mercy on me, O God,
      because of your unfailing love.
   Because of your great compassion,
      blot out the stain of my sins.
2 Wash me clean from my guilt.
      Purify me from my sin.
3 For I recognize my rebellion;

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God.
      Renew a loyal spirit within me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
      and make me willing to obey you.

15 Unseal my lips, O Lord,
      that my mouth may praise you.

17 The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit.
      You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God.
 

Prayer

Heavenly Father, thank you for speaking to me so loudly this morning.  Thank you for being intimately involved in my life and faithful to your objective to mature me into the image of Christ.  Lord, thank you for taking care of details and leading me along your path.  Father, may I be faithful to you, and may I glorify your Name - for you are worthy of all praise.  I pray this in the name of Jesus Christ, my Redeemer.  Amen.