My wife and I had a heart-to-heard discussion about the "geeks" post two days ago (which involved a few emails with a couple in our Sunday School class). My wife told me honestly and frankly that she detects a hint of pride and a condescending attitude when I use big words or discuss science and engineering. She knows me better than anyone else on the planet, so I trust what she says about me (I think she even knows me better than I know myself; she's just that perceptive). It stings a little to be humbled, but since I've been praying that God will humble me ... well, I guess I asked for it. It's fascinating that this morning's reading includes some verses that directly apply:
1 Cor. 4:3 As for me, it matters very little how I might be evaluated by you or by any human authority. I don't even trust my own judgment on this point. 4 My conscience is clear, but that doesn't prove I'm right. It is the Lord himself who will examine me and decide. 5 So don't make judgments about anyone ahead of time—before the Lord returns. For he will bring our darkest secrets to light and will reveal our private motives. Then God will give to each one whatever praise is due.
So, I believe that God has used this situation to make me aware of previously unconscious or semi-conscious pride. Clearly, I need to change. The question is, "How?" On the one hand, God has given me gifts and talents to be used to glorify Him, but on the other hand, any form of pride or arrogance (great or small) is evil, wicked, worldly, and satanic. I need wisdom to know when it is appropriate for me to discuss certain things and when it is not. I pray that God will make this clear to me.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, I thank you for speaking to me through this situation, and I thank you for humbling me because I know that you stiff-arm the proud but give grace to the humble. Lord, I ask you to give me grace and humility. Lord, I want to glorify you and not myself. I am not worthy of honor or praise; it is You who deserve all glory, and I dare not share in any. Thank you for revealing my hidden motives, which you not only judiciously scrutinize, but you also compassionately sanctify. Lord, please show me the proper way to live, and help me be sensitive to the Holy Spirit's leading. I ask that you strip away from me anything that does not reflect your holiness. I ask you to continue to humble me. I pray this in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
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