I finally realized why King David didn't go out to war with his soldiers (from the reading in 2 Samuel 21 a few days ago):
15 Once again there was a battle between the Philistines and Israel. David went down with his men to fight against the Philistines, and he became exhausted. 16 And Ishbi-Benob, one of the descendants of Rapha, whose bronze spearhead weighed three hundred shekels and who was armed with a new sword , said he would kill David. 17 But Abishai son of Zeruiah came to David's rescue; he struck the Philistine down and killed him. Then David's men swore to him, saying, "Never again will you go out with us to battle, so that the lamp of Israel will not be extinguished."
But here's the thing - God didn't tell King David not to go to war with his soldiers. In fact, this is a decision based on fear (i.e., minimizing risk). If King David had reviewed several of his life experiences (e.g., shepherding against lions and bears, fighting Goliath, fleeing from King Saul, etc.), perhaps he would have realized that Yahweh provides salvation. God made King David with skills of being a leader in battle, so why did he agree to denying what God had made him to do? Fear.
Where does operating based on fear lead you? Restlessness. Because you are not enjoying the invigorating experience of living the Dream God has planned for you. Where does all of that fear, speculation, boredom lead? Sin.
The beauty of this story is how God convicted David of his sin, David repented, and God forgave him. Grace. It's chocked full of grace. Our life is by grace - grace after grace.
2 Samuel 12:13 - Then David confessed to Nathan, "I have sinned against the Lord." Nathan replied, "Yes, but the Lord has forgiven you, and you won't die for this sin.
David's heartfelt response is so transparent in Psalm 32:
1 Oh, what joy for thosewhose disobedience is forgiven,whose sin is put out of sight!2 Yes, what joy for thosewhose record the Lord has cleared of guilt,whose lives are lived in complete honesty!5 Finally, I confessed all my sins to youand stopped trying to hide my guilt.I said to myself, "I will confess my rebellion to the Lord."And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.6 Therefore, let all the godly pray to you while there is still time,that they may not drown in the floodwaters of judgment.7 For you are my hiding place;you protect me from trouble.You surround me with songs of victory.8 The Lord says, "I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.I will advise you and watch over you.11 So rejoice in the Lord and be glad, all you who obey him!Shout for joy, all you whose hearts are pure!
Prayer
Heavenly Father, I praise you because you are good. You are always good. Your love never fails. It is because of your great love that we are not consumed; your mercies are new every morning. Sadly, I fail you every single day. I confess that I am a broken man; I need you to save me! I live by grace alone. You have given me grace upon grace. May I live the life you have called me to according to your grace. I pray this in the name of the one who paid my debt, Jesus Christ. Amen.
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